All These Simple, Sacred Things

Yes, this is a photograph of Winter.  And yes, according to the calendar, it is Spring.  But the thermometer hasn't received the memo, at least not here in The Land That Time Forgot.  This would normally be the planting weekend, but that will have to wait.  And so will we, but the fire's warm and there's now more time for interior Spring cleaning.

Yesterday I took advantage of the more seasonal weather to clean up the yard and I went to gather supplies.  Most of the time I like to stay in town, shopping at the local markets.  I often doubt there is much savings in traveling to stores with lower prices, as the fuel used in the travel itself eliminates any savings.  But about once a month, or so, I go on a trip to stock up on things that I use regularly or the things that cannot find here.  While I'm out, I like to stop in at my favorite second hand stores to see if they have anything on my wish/want list.  I try to use recycled things whenever possible.  I was very lucky at these stores this time, finding a pair of drapes for my living room, a floor lamp, and a country dress.  I found some lovely old plates, hand made linen doilies, and old wooden pestles. Some of these will be added to my gift box, and some will be given a new life in my old house.

About an hour into my venture, however, I always long to head back to my little place, the less-busy, prettier place, to shop at the tiny store that reminds me of my childhood.  There's something so simple about having less choice and to find ways of making due with something that may be slightly different than what was originally imagined.  Dinner menus are never absolute until you have all the ingredients in your cupboard.  I remember my mother,  a daily shopper, preferring smaller lists and shorter trips.  When my children were young, this way of shopping wasn't practical, but now I am appreciating the value in shorter, more frequent shopping trips. I also see the monetary savings to shopping this way, as there is much less waste, buying no more than what I currently need.  Of course, having a small country kitchen with few cupboards makes stocking up a little challenging, as extra kitchen storage is found only in the basement.

I am beginning to become comfortable with a life without  many schedules and absolutes, where once I embraced my routines and menu plans.  I am no longer nervous if I have an empty space on the calendar; in fact I am overjoyed with my "freedom days."  Of course, like most, I still have schedules that I have no choice but to keep, but since I do, I try not to make a schedule out of everyday or necessary tasks, and I try to take the stress out of chores.  For me, household chores are not work, but quite frankly, what I prefer to do over my paying job.  Yes, sometimes to do both is challenging, but I try not to let the part of my life that I enjoy cause stress - hence my current way of handling the food shopping, making it a simple, enjoyable part of my life instead of another chore on a list of others.  While so many have diminished the importance of what was once called, and I still proudly call  Women's Work, we who know the true value of such things, know that we have nothing to be ashamed of; that it is every bit as valuable as it's always been.   It is these kinds of valuable things, however, that are never really appreciated until they aren't present, or until they come with a price tag.

Today I am grateful the warm fire, a freedom day, my old house, my beautiful part of the world, health, love and life with my husband, and all the simple, sacred things.*

-Aine

*"Gratitude Sunday post at Wooly Moss Roots

The Times, They Are a-Changing

Before I begin, I want to remind all my readers that I also have a wordpress blog that I am trying to keep updated with the same posts as I add here.  I started that blog because I wasn't sure if blogger would continue forever, giving all the changes in Google.  From my experience if Google doesn't make a point of stating that they are NOT discontinuing a site, there is a good chance they will.

It turns out that while I am still unsure, I am becoming less and less happy with the interference of Google +.    For example, just as I typed that Google plus, a drop down menu appeared here on my post. See? That's what I'm talking about.  I also don't like that I have to be careful when commenting, because some comments are set up to post on Google Plus.  Now, I know that the internet is far from private, but when I am posting about my own private, or spiritual subjects, I don't like the information going out "public." 

Aside from that, the time it takes for G+ to gather all my information to sell makes blogging very slow.  I open my blog and have to wait a long time before I can begin.    So, anyway, this all makes Wordpress look like a very valuable option.  I will try to copy and paste all my posts there from now on, and if you have me on a reader, I encourage you to add my wordpress blog in case I am no longer here.

In other news:  As many of you have concluded from my rather cryptic posts, I have had to engage in a little magic lately.  I  don't post specifics about my work, but I did mention that I had to perform a "redo" as the energy the first time around was diluted by my empathy, which was misplaced.  Armed with the truth, the ugly truth, I tried again and this time the results were very good.

Reading  blogs on Reader or Blog lovin makes it easy to recognize certain trends in the posts.  I noticed that recently many of the authors of the blogs I read are beginning to rethink their path, some even experiencing a dark night of the soul.  I, too, have had a bit of a spiritual epiphany.  While it is sometimes unexpected and disturbing to find yourself doubting and questioning something that is so important in the lives of many of us, it is also the way we find our true path.  Remember many of the paths we walk are simply there to lead us to others.  Just as with certain life events, everything has value as it is an experience and prompts you towards others.

I believe that the neopaganism of the '70's reopened our eyes to Paganism in general.  Suddenly, it seemed, uncovered from abandoned graves, was a wealth of information on a new kind of spirituality, born of something very ancient.  It was often unclear what was original or adapted or even completely new, but for those of us who were in spiritual search mode, we were willing to try anything and sometimes, announce to the world, or ourselves, that we were now part of this group.  Sometimes we made this announcement a bit prematurely, as we would later find out as our search continued.

Eventually, those who continued the quest found that many of the elements of one path or tradition was the same or similar to that of another and we marveled at that as it gave our beliefs even more credibility.   We established ourselves as "eclectic" or we adhered to a strict tradition.  And, yes, there were "wars."  Somethings never change  - yes even in the Age of Aquarius.

Quite a bit of time has passed since the early days and many of us, now seasoned spiritual searchers, are finding that guidance is coming more from within; that we are being taught and prompted by the very energies unearthed decades ago. Some of us have discovered that it is the spirits, the ancestors, the gods themselves who are in charge and they are choosing their own.  We know this because we feel their presence or their influence, we are taught in a way that feels like "knowing"  and we are experienced enough to follow these prompts.

I know I am not alone in the feeling that it is more important now to keep a practice, more than it is to be part of a path or a religion.  I am coming to terms with the idea that we may be moving into a time of personal practice, or perhaps practicing in the smallest of groups (tribes.)

All the while the conventional religions pull away from practice and focus strongly on forming groups, and the continuous recruiting of those of other or no faith.  The church is the focus, the rules and beliefs without room for adaptation by an individual believer.   There is no tolerance for personal beliefs.  It is an all or nothing thing.  The group mind is the only truth.

Perhaps that is why many of today's pagans feel less pull to groups or strict and formal ritual.  Maybe we have been called to stop talking and to listen, to stop exploring outside and to go deeper within, to sharpen our senses with practice, to empower our magic with knowing, and to refuse to confine ourselves to labels, to name something that is too enormous to be separate from who we are.

Over the years, I , like most Pagans, have collected a huge library, a closet full of curious, supplies, all the results of my searching for the "right" or the "special" item, the perfect this or that.  I spent many years searching for the sacred outside of myself.  While I still cherish some of these things, they no longer hold the power, and some are simply distractions for me now. I am feeling guided by something outside of myself, and I am trusting this guidance in my work, in my life and in my beliefs.

And I know, from reading your blogs, that many of you are feeling the same way, and that this only adds to the validity of my suspicions.

The times, they are a-changing, my friends.

-Aine

Respite from Routine

The moon is waxing 44% in the sign of Leo.  The planetary ruler of the day is Venus.  Leo's attachment to family, as well as self-love, the growing moon, and the influence of Venus make this a perfect time to spend quality time with family, close friends and on self improvement/self awareness.  There have been several difficult energy combinations this week, and so the change in the air is quite tangible.  This is a lighter, happier time; an out-in-the-open time and personal interactions are less complicated, some downright joyful.  This is a fine way to begin the weekend.

Here at the Mermaid Cafe I am looking forward to a long weekend. Phone calls will be screened.  The yard is quite proud of her long flowing green hair, nourished by lots of rain.  Managing her mane will allow for a decent exercise workout at the same time.  My little apple tree is blossoming. The plants hardy enough to survive my lack of gardening skills are flourishing.  I sense long-awaited Spring.

-Aine

Vacation Retreats

Today the moon is waxing 35% in the sign of Leo.  The planetary ruler today is Jupiter.  The energy today will feel quite different from that of the past few days.  This is a more outgoing energy, self focused, in need of attention, and social-minded.  The planet Jupiter is a planet of luck and prosperity, so any endeavor in which money is made due to social/personal recognition skills is favored.  Charisma is your tool of choice today.

Spring is taking her time this year.  Another cold morning in front of the fire, the wind howling, and the cold rain pelting down.  I don't mind.  I am not ready for the bustle of the summer, the mad dash of the sun worshipers.  My sleepy little town never really awakens fully, certainly not in the way that outsiders believe it should. Her eyes are always only half open, ready to doze off again in a moment's notice.  

Today, vacation destinations are expected to excite and entertain, rather than be respites from the busyness of our routines.  Many people do not know how to enjoy the stillness.  They are not lulled into a trance by the ocean.  They don't take midnight walks to admire a sky full of stars.  They bore so easily and take no pleasure in the natural beauty of a place, the way it can swaddle and settle us down into a blissful state so difficult to experience in a bustling world.

You see, The Land that Time Forgot is not a place for late-night shopping or nightclubs that stay open until the early morning hours.  There are no Starbucks coffee shops or chain stores, no amusement parks or casinos.  

It is quiet here.  

And that terrifies a lot of people.  What will we do?   Where will we go?  How will we manage to stay constantly amused, distracted and satisfied?  

I heard the familiar groans as I closed the shop yesterday.  They came from a group of people strolling down the sidewalk a block away.  As I walked past them, I noticed they looked dazed, almost panicked at the lack of stimulation available in a seaside town too early in a season that is taking her time.  They are feeling the effects of a cold-turkey detox from a life of over-stimulation and too much information, their ears unable to hear the softer tones of the tide, the wind, unable to appreciate the sacred hush of blissful nothingness.

I suspect that I will never cease to be amazed that so many would, while waiting on a dinner reservation, prefer to spend the time browsing inside a stuffy shop when time could be spent on the edge of the sea, gazing out at the skeletons of great ships, silhouetted against the twilight sky.

Sometimes I imagine how I would "sell" this place to those who travel, if by chance, that happened to be my job.  At the end of my reveries, I realize that I could never sell this to everyone, but only to those that already long for the world to slow down, for the noise to stop; those who not only can, but want to turn their cell phones off, want to be unreachable, want to leave the building for a determined or an undetermined amount of time.  I could only attract those who already wish to be serenaded by birds too early in the morning, lulled to sleep by fog horns and watched by a sentinel of crows sitting on the tops of trees and on power lines; those that are intrigued by tales of brave settlers and ghosts, who are thrilled to discover small graveyards in unexpected places, the tiny markers barely legible. 

I know I could only reach those who dream of late nights on front porches,  the embrace of silence and an enormous sky.

The Dark Side

Today the moon is waxing in the sign of Cancer.  The planetary ruler is Mercury, a good time for effective communication, especially meaningful, thoughtful communication.  Well thought out conversations will have just the effect you desire.  That which you have never said, can now be spoken without fear of being misunderstood.  Communication that is important can find no better time to be delivered.

In magic, use the planetary seal of Mercury in your magic to help communicate your desires to the otherworld, and make use of magical communication whether it be words, prayers, songs, or symbols to strengthen any Work.

I am often amazed at how ignorant others believe I am.  I will admit, I keep a low profile, as all those who dabble in magic too. We like to keep our activities private, not out of fear, but in order to keep their energies intact, untouched by those who would likely interfere, simply by knowing of their existence.  So I "hide my light under a bushel" as they say. I do this in regards to any knowledge or talent I have, magical or practical, unless there is something to be gained from exposure.  Most often, however, there is much more to be gained from keeping quiet - often what is gained is a surprise attack, or retaliation, revenge of the sweetest kind.

So I watch as others play their hands way too soon, tell their stories with way too much revealing detail, and try to lie with faces that will not obey.  Amateurs, every one. 

Today communication is key, and magical communication is fueled with additional power.  Coincidentally today I have a "re-do" scheduled, something that occasionally has to be done when a working just didn't have enough intention behind it, when other emotions/energies may have been present, things like doubt, fear, or sometimes even misplaced sympathy.  Today, however, nothing will interfere with my intention, my intent, my magic, and the result.

As Mr. T. once said, "I pity the fool."

Homecoming

Today the moon is waxing 18% in the sign of Cancer.  The planetary ruler is Mars.  With the influence of Mars today, we are better emotionally equipped to handle the energies of the day.  Serious, sensitive Cancer is still with us, but the moon is growing stronger and so are we.

For quite a while I did not live in the world.  I lived in my own little world, in my own house on my own street, purposely focusing on my immediate surroundings.  I did not watch television, or read the news, in paper form or online.  At this time I was also going through the height of my menopause and I just wasn't equipped to cope with anything that wasn't happening in my own backyard.

Then I felt stronger and I thought that it might be a good idea to venture out into the world again. I really should know what was going on.   So I did, and I found that you really can't be two places at once.  The worlds really do collide.  As it turns out, you may not be able to do something about things that happen to other people in other places, but the vapor of these energies have no problem  finding a way into your little cottage, slipping underneath the door and into your mind, influencing your moods and hijacking your focus.  Worries become global, so large and looming that your little world, your space, your sanctuary is hard to find.

Most of us have heard the statement "Charity begins at home."  I believe that everything begins at home.  Our little world influences the little world of others, until crowds of little worlds are influencing the big world, the universe.  But how can anything begin in a home where we are not really present?  So, no more browsing the news everyday online, being influence by the reporter who writes the copy in a way that will lure people to read.   Sensationalism is truly alive and well.   What moments of our own lives have we lost while mesmerized by the saga of a brutal murder trial? Why do we want to know about horrific things we have been lucky enough not to have experienced? (my reasoning for never watching gory horror movies)

And if you are of a mind that believes that pulling the covers over one's head will not make things go away, then consider the opposite.  Attention feeds energies/behaviors.  These can be positive or negative situations/people, so be careful what you feed.  My bed tent is warm and fuzzy. 

As I write this, the yellow glow of the lamp in the hallway is comforting.  I love warm yellow light, especially when it is dark enough during the day to keep the lamps on.  It is a glow that I remember from my childhood, as I walked home in the rain, seeing it from a distance, a beacon glowing in the picture window of the tiny Cape Cod style house.

Today it is raining in the Land That Time Forgot.  It is foggy.  Rainy season continues and the grass is fluorescent glow-in-the-dark green, the shrubs are blooming, the smallest birds sing the largest songs of joy.  They have come home again.

And so have I.

-Aine

Crabby

Today the moon is waxing, 12% in the sign of Cancer.  The planetary ruler today is the moon. This combination can be a difficult one. Cancer creates a sense of longing, a desire to belong, to find our home, our family and our friends.  Be careful.  Remember, when feeling diminished, we may try to fit into places that are too small,  try too hard to get along with those we'd be better off without.  With the moon ruling the day it is wise not to venture too far from home today, but let the moon pull us deeper within.  Today we will not find what we seek outside ourselves, but inside there is a comfortable chair, a warm quilt and a familiar friend.

I am really feeling the energy of this day. It feels too big to me today, too consuming, too challenging.  At the same time parts of it feel too small, too insignificant to even care about. This is a day best spent in a cave.  

But there are things to do.  

Today I may use the strong energies of the day to focus on each minute, each activity, each interaction on it's own, without linking it to anything the next one, the implication or the meaning.  Today, when washing the dishes, I will think about washing the dishes. I will admire the faded blue pattern of the small antique plates, the warm water, the sun coming in the window.  When I walk to work, I will see each house I pass, every budding plant that struggles away from the darkness towards the waiting sun, every person I pass, the dog on the lease, the baby in the stroller. 

I will focus on these things, and nothing more.  Nothing today will mean anything other than what it means.  I will not compare myself to anyone, or let anything remind me of something else.  I will see others as they appear on the surface, and go no deeper.  I will believe all I am told, and hear only what is spoken.  

Using the Cancer energy of the day I will be like the crab, moving about, but protected by a shell, the portable cave that comes with me everywhere I go. 

Buried Treasure

I don't understand those who need a great amount of attention, my young life spent in a small solitary room serving imaginary tea to dressed up stuffed bears and dolls with painted smiles, behind the fence peeking through the spaces in between slats.  I didn't want to be noticed, hiding the flames of my hair, the bones of my legs, my sponge-mind, picture perfect memory, all that set me apart and made others curious, made them uncomfortable, jealous and mean.

And when it comes to creativity, I am the only audience I need and sometimes the only one I want.  This is not true for many people today, especially the younger ones.  Not only do they need for their creations to be noticed, they create simply to be noticed.  Art, on its own, is no longer enough.  Art without recognition is worthless.  They have misunderstood the creative process,  no longer the way in which we release the longings of our deeper places, but a vulgar display case of hope, a vanity mirror reflecting nothing.

Yesterday I let someone doodle and create  specifically to be recognized while I was busying with my own  outer creations, my personal relationships and social interactions.  It is how I find meaning in otherwise thankless work. I don't really need thanks, only to know that what I do matters to someone.

I am finding a depth in everyday people that I had not previously recognized, or perhaps forgot they had.  I live in a place where it is easier to connect with others, and I know that many people live in places that are simply not conducive to this kind of contact; many places where people plug in and tune out. Headphones in place, typing madly on a cell phone are indicators that no real interaction is desired.

But,  I sense another type of person emerging, groups of people, even those that do not live in places like this.  They are small in numbers right now, but hopefully growing, those who long to interact with other humans, face to face, those who know that true communication is not achieved simply through the words themselves, but by words delivered on the breeze of a soothing voice, intermingled within the the purr of love and longing, or hidden in the rush of a rainfall of laughter.

I imagine that these people turn their cell phones off during dinner.  Music plays softly in the background of meaningful conversations.  Their letters are written by hand on delicate paper, stamped and mailed, received by another real hand that opens it belonging to a real person who smiles expectantly.  They read printed books and dog-ear the pages.

These people know that an e-card is not the same as one touched by your own hand, signed in your own script, that a gift certificate is not the same as choosing the perfect gift after much thought and that a text message is not the same as a call, or a visit.

Welcome back, old friends,  family, community, tribe, the barefooted, braided wise ones.  I hope that we can take a few steps backwards together and become reacquainted. Let's sift through the cheap plastic rubble and uncover the treasure buried in a time capsule. 

Or lets, as the pilot says as the plane comes in for a landing here, "turn our watches ahead one hour and back 20 years."

-Aine

Repairing the Line

I read a bit of my Granddaughter's writing recently.  She had to write a little about herself. She is a good writer, a trait passed down to various members of our family.  What made me the most happy, however, was the way she freely wrote about herself, about all her achievements and talents.  She wrote enthusiastically, without feeling the need to be modest.

I thought about my own childhood and wondered what I would write if I had been given the same assignment.  I know that I would not have been so proud of my achievements.  I know it would have nothing to do with modesty.  I simply wouldn't have realized my talents and my potential.  I certainly would not have been proud of myself.  I spent most of my childhood feeling not good enough.

After I read her piece I was so proud, and I was so very relieved.   This was proof positive that despite the bad seed in our bloodline, it has, over a short period of time, been repaired.  We can now continue with a stronger maternal line.  We will now have a line of good mothers, nurturing women and strong, confident children. 

-Aine

The Brighter Side

The world is often the subject of conversation lately.  Many people shake their heads and comment about how wrong the world is, how the economy is failing, how hard it is to live and how things have suddenly changed.  I don't dispute the challenges that we face now.  But when I think about it, and look back, I see more how the world is slowing down, taking a few steps back, returning to the way it used to be.

The parents of my generation grew up in The Depression era.  My generation, however grew up in a time of prosperity in North America, a time of great change. Life became easier, money and jobs more plentiful.  We didn't want for very much, and we wanted and assumed we could provide this easy life for our children.  It was more difficult to give them this life, but we worked hard to do that.  These too were quite prosperous times, and many of us believed they would never end.  So we went overboard, consumed too much, ran up debt, ignored the sensible things our parents did, like putting money aside for a rainy day.  And when the rainy day came, as it always does, we were in trouble.  This latest rainy day was more of a typhoon, of course, and in the aftermath we are, once again, living in difficult times.

Many of us have adjusted, but had to make big changes to do so.  Through this process, though, many of us have also experienced an awakening.  We have seen how much we used to think we needed, and now without the means to have all of these "necessities" we have made do, and I know that I'm not alone in discovering how little I need, how much of what I used to need was more what I wanted or believed that I needed.  I also discovered how much more fulfilling a simple life is.  After we clear away the clutter, the discarded, broken and disappointing things that once provided temporary pleasure, we discover once again what real pleasure is.

One of the big adjustments that I've had to make is the acceptance that a life without fear is not achieved by having safety nets all around you.  We have been taught that you must prepare for every potential  situation, usually by spending too much money for this protection.  While this is often a sensible thing to do, many of us no longer have the means anymore to build this impenetrable fortress around our lives anymore.  So we do what we can, and we hope for the best. 

My move from the prosperous city to the not-so-prosperous country has allowed me to see this kind of living in action.  I see many people living in what they sometimes lovingly refer to as "falling-down-houses" who live a rather fearless life.  They hope for the best, prepare as best they can for the future and do what they can, when they can, sacrificing what most of us would consider the "good things" in life, for the true good things - a roof over their heads,  hearty meals, friends,  living in a beautiful part of the world.  We make money when we can, however we can, and most importantly we spend it only when we can and on what we need, leaving the wants for our special days, and for the days when we are graced with unexpected abundance.

I believe there is the potential for something very good to come of this awakening. I hope for a return of society - of using cooperation, charity, give and take as an alternative to the paid institutions who claim to protect us.  Helping each other instead of calling paid agencies and individuals to provide this help and in return know that someone will be there to help us in times of need.

This is what I hope. I know that there is often, if not always, a positive result born of difficulty, and that there are times when change simply must happen, the reset button must be pushed.  Sometimes enough is truly enough.

-Aine

A Day of Truth

The moon is waning, 6%, in the sign of Aries.  Today the planetary ruler is Mars.  This explains my mood for the past two days.  The dark moon offers many hiding places but Aries gives you see-in-the dark glasses.  Mars arms you with the fearlessness to enter the dark places and find what is lurking under the surface.

It is a day for truth.

I am often pulled in two directions at once.  I believe this is because I have the ability to know the people behind their facades, and also to understand their motives.  This makes me a very compassionate, or at least a moderately understanding person.  I like to believe that everyone is basically good.  However, since I also have what some would call a gift, I can easily see behind the mask and what is behind there is not always pretty. 

That's when the pull, the tug of war between compassion and protection begins. 

The animal instincts of more manipulative people give them the ability to discern the proper way to "play" any situation or person.  They, too, have a gift, but their gift comes from life in the dark forests, the dangerous streets, not from the guidance of a spiritual being.  They realize when they have come on too strong, played their hand too soon, given themselves away, and they simply change direction, cover their tracks, apologize.

The animal senses are strong in the dark forest people. And no matter how I long to be a good person - that compassionate understanding person, who sees all the reasons behind the unacceptable behaviors, who knows that not everyone has the same advantages in life - I am also the wise woman  in the old cottage in the woods,  who knows the dangers of the forest,  knows how to protect herself, making use of all the woodland has to offer, energies that grow there, are buried there,  that hide in the trees and dance in the dark, the spirits that teach us of magic - the power, the mystery, the dedication and the obligation.

Today all energies are ready for battle. This battle may be one within or one in the outside world.  This may be the day you get a peak behind the masks of others, discover their motives, benevolent or malevolent.  If you find yourself in the middle of a battle, mental, physical or spiritual, energies are in your favor.  Be brave.  Search for truth, and be willing to accept it.

-Aine

Inheritance

http://shrew-ed.tumblr.com/

Lately I have experienced the disappointments and surprises so many of us do when going through the sad process of taking care of the family things, as one generation fades into the mist and the next one takes over.  This has prompted me to think quite a bit about the word inheritance. 

I watch those who argue over things that will never hold the meaning they once did.  What good is an empty china cup without the match, without the tea that is poured into them, without the blustery day and the warm cup held by cold hands?  The delicate blue flowered plate is nothing without the sweetest cookie and a kitchen full of bowls and flour-covered counters.  These things are what some consider their inheritance.  These are simple things that can tear families apart.  These things, that some believe hold a memory are, by themselves, only things, just a cup, just a plate, but they hold onto them for dear life, even at the risk of alienating family members.  These things are poor substitutes for what really constitutes an inheritance.

I have inherited my love for pretty things.  My tea is still served in delicate bone china. My counters and wooden boards are often covered in flour.  I have inherited my eye for placement and for gathering the mismatched and the discarded and giving them new life.  I have inherited my love for old country things, faded, distressed and in need of repair, and for fires in the hearth, a rocking chair, old books with many pages. I have inherited my Grandmother's large hands and her love of the mysterious. I have inherited my love for rainy days and for stories that become more colorful with age.

I have also inherited my times of great sadness and my longing for a dark room and an unmade bed.  I have inherited my discomfort in social situations, and my feelings of inadequacy in regards to mothering.    These hand-me-downs are the ones that I have, with much work, repaired,  altered, or sometimes discarded,  preferring instead to create better things to pass along, such as humor, refusal to accept unhealthy situations, common sense, bravery, defiance, magic.

Sometimes you have to dismiss the seduction of soft focused memories and look harshly into the faded photos.  See what you were.  Look in the mirror.  See what you are.  What part of your inheritance will you keep and pass on to the future generations?  What will you create from your own very unique mix of blood and experience?

I have inherited quite a mix of light and shadow, of charisma and melancholy.  These are all gifts, some more welcomed than others.  We come here with a hope chest full of  hand me downs, of patterns and material, various colors,  textures and fabrics.  This is what we inherit.  With these remnants we make something new.

-Aine

No Hurry

I love the fact that Spring is taking its time, that a fire burns in the cool mornings and after sundown.  This year, instead of rushing in, Spring is slowly emerging, like Autumn, giving us time to adjust. We can wear those inbetween-seasons clothes, first shoes without socks moving slowly into sandals and then finally letting our toes wiggle in the grass.  I have time to check the progress of every little bud and sprout.  I can leisurely wash the windows, a few at a time, rake the leftover leaves, mow the law, left too long before the frost.

This year I am in no hurry for summer. Maybe this is how it gets when we age.  We slow down, no longer rushing ahead. It's time to appreciate the place in which we have arrived, after all.  We have no agendas to keep, no people to compete with or to make proud.  No more official pieces of paper to receive, or titles to earn. 

Life doesn't stand still but moves slower, long enough for us to absorb the meaning of it all.  We hear the words left unsaid, see the lies behind the masked eyes.  Unveiled are the simple ways that love and understanding are offered, with no strings attached.  The dead speak to us in the ways that they do, a familiar voice heard in the moment before sleep, a whiff of tobacco or vintage perfume, the old photograph never seen before, their words slipping out of our own mouths. 

Yesterday I spent some time visiting a second hand shop, picking up various "precious things," to put away for gifts - china teacups with bright red flowers, a white cotton eyelet bib apron, and old bottle, and lace doilies.  I give only a little thought to the eventual owner of these things, but simply put them away in a box with the other things, knowing that they will eventually find the right home.  I kept the canning jar pitcher for myself.  This morning the orange juice tasted fresher.

One of the most beautiful and powerful things about magic is its ability to take care of things, even to the point of soothing our own negative worrisome thoughts.  For me, the minute I decide on a magical solution to a difficult life situation, that situation is no longer weighing on my mind.  I know that I will do everything that I can do, and then, so it will be.  What it will be is left to be revealed, but I feel comforted that I did my part and trust that those who help me will do the rest. 

Yesterday I shopped for a few things I needed for the Work, and gave some thought to disposal, wanting to avoid any disposal that would not organically break down, substituting natural items.  In my practice the disposal is a very important part of the Work, so I had to consider the way in which I do it, adapting and adjusting ancient practices for the time, considering the earth we are trying to heal.

So now, Sunday.  The moon is waning 18% in sign of Pisces and the planet that rules the day is The Sun.  The dark moon combined with the dreamy spiritual energy of Pisces is perfect energy for the Work I will do today, and the powerful sun offers the success of that work.  For other activities, it is a likely to be more of a day of introversion, of quiet creative activities, but the results of anything done today is likely to be successful, positive.  So, for example, should there be some creative work to be done, today's energy will make it easy for you to work, head's down, until it is finished and the results will be pleasing.

-Aine

The Magic of Ordinary Things

I said I would rise above.  Oh how wonderful it would be if all situations asked so little of us.  

But some situations and people will not be ignored and when we dare to try, they intensify, angry at the rejection, the lack of expected response.  They change direction,  create new strategies.  

They refuse to be ignored simply because they mustn't be.  

Sometimes we must rise above, and sometimes we must rise to the challenge and take action. And when physical action cannot be taken, or has been tried and failed, then it is time for magic.

But even in this place, this place of unspeakable power,  we make use of the simplest things, the quiet unsuspecting things.   Ordinary, precious things with hidden potential. A piece of bitter fruit, a candle rubbed with oil, whispered verses old as the earth. The cracked wooden bowl, the tin cup, the secret alphabets, the seals of planets.

The clock ticks as the hands fall, not in defeat, but in completion.  

It is done.

Tarot Course Lesson Nineteen - The Moon

Tarot Course

Lesson Nineteen

The Moon

The Moon card in the Tarot is as mysterious as the moon itself.  A predictable and powerful force, one that rules the tides, cycles, causes dogs to howl and, when full,  prompts people to act strangely - even to the point of insanity.  

 

Or does the moon's light simply illuminate what is already present and hiding in the darkness?

That is the simple yet powerful interpretation of The Moon card.  Something lurks in the darkness and may soon be revealed.  Where is this darkness?  Is it the seeker's own mind?  If so, then something is buried deep, so deep perhaps even the seeker does not know it exists. When this card appears, however, the light will soon shine on this secret and there is likely to be much turmoil.

The idea of a hidden thing also suggests dishonesty. The moon appears when lies are begin told, secrets are being kept and illusions are present.  It's time to keep a close eye on the people and the situation involved in the reading.  It's also a good idea for the seeker to look to her own perceptions.  Is she being delusional?  Living in a dream world?  Turning a blind eye to deception?

The howling dogs can suggest that the seeker is being warned.  Maybe friends are suggesting that she take a closer look at a situation, or maybe the universe is nudging her to do the same by way of strange "coincidences.  Or maybe the seeker herself has a gut feeling about something or someone that simply won't be ignored.  

Even the appearance of The Moon card can be startling.  Often this card will appear when other cards point to contentment, abundance and grace.  Secrets often hide in unexpected places.  

 

Other Images of The Moon

Exercise - Explore secrets within yourself by placing The Moon card face up and contemplate the image for a bit.  Then choose another card from your deck and use the imagery in that card to give more insights in to the hidden mysteries within yourself.

All previous lessons can be found by clicking on Black Crow Tarot Course below the header of this blog.

© Aine O'brien

Peace and Love

A cooler morning here and so I lit the fire.  I know in the summer I will miss these mornings, so I am taking advantage of every opportunity to bring in some logs and set them ablaze in the stove. In a few minutes I will hear the crows call me and I will throw out my leftover bread. 

It is the last day of a trying week. I am dealing with a lot of non-complimentary energies and it's difficult, but there are many lessons to learn here.  I suspect, however, these lessons will be lost to those who need them most, but I have learned to let go of the things I cannot change, and resist being drawn into the exaggerated drama of others. 

 I find it sad that some people cannot be content to be small, cannot appreciate their simple place in the world. They cannot find satisfaction, peace or tranquility. There is so much to learn in the quiet and in the shadows and yet for some, calm moments are too quiet, simplicity is too dull, and the soul is insatiably starving for something they cannot name, so instead, they feed on that which will never sustain them.  

But I am not a preacher, and my own way of finding myself is not necessarily the path of others, so I can only be an example and to be that I must not fall prey to the behaviors of others.  I will rise above it.

Today the moon is waning 37% in the sign of Aquarius and the planetary ruler of the day is Venus, so it is no surprise that our thoughts move outside our own individual situation and are more universal.  We are more interested now in improving a group mindset - making peace in family and society situations. All you need is love.  Peace and Love.  But of course, this love originates in our own individual hearts.  Magical work towards universal love and peace is favored today, and God knows, the world could really use it.

-Aine

The Outing

Yesterday was a beautiful day and so, since The Bard and I had a day off together, we decided to take a ride.  Taking a ride is something people used to do, usually on Sundays. The destination was not always clear and it was often better that way because then the focus was not about getting there, but enjoying the trip.  

We have lived in the Mermaid Cafe for a little over two years now, but were so busy creating the life and the home we envisioned that we haven't had a lot of time to explore.  Now we are occasionally more free to do so.  

Overall, this place is beautiful, but depending on where you are on any given day, during which season and in various weather conditions this beauty presents itself in different ways.  

Yesterday we drove into the summer, the temperature increasing as we went.  The sun was bright, everything so green it was almost fluorescent and I was certain that in the dark it would glow, lighting the groves for fairies I am sure live in places such as these.  We ended up in farmland, and in lovely small towns with beautiful old buildings, a mix of bungalows and enormous Victorians, tiny shops with resident cats and old pubs with ornate, hand crafted bars.

I had forgotten the simple pleasure of "going for a drive," exploring without a real destination, or one that can easily be replaced with a different one, making decisions as you go, turning off the beaten path, getting lost and then finding the way back again.  We arrived home, grateful for the adventure,  and arms open wide to receive the warm embrace of all our familiar things.

-Aine

Sacred Apathy

Every day we are at risk for absorbing the energies we work very hard to stay far away from.  It's easy to find peace when you're sitting in your comfy chair by the fire, hanging clothes on the line on a sunny day, kneading bread on a wooden board, or meditating on a comfortable pillow.  But in the world we must live in, the society we must become a part of, and in situations we do not choose, it is much harder to stay in that place many people call the center.  For me, I have to stop being concerned with things that really don't matter, those exaggerated and fabricated situations and issues that are often not at all interested in resolution, but energies that simply want constant attention.  Since these energies are fed by attention, it is best to pay them no mind.  

Is this easy?  No.  Not at all.  These are demanding, hungry energies, insatiable and greedy.  They will stay with you longer after contact.  You find yourself thinking about them and reacting once again towards them, with the same or more intensity than the first encounter.  They probe and taunt you, pushing buttons, daring you to fight back.  

Never fight back.  The only weapon is disregard.  Once that which does not matter is no longer validated and fed by our attention, our priorities are once again in proper order. This is the practice of Sacred Apathy, the protection of your spirit through the art of proper focus of attention.

Today the moon is waning 60% in the sign of Capricorn.  The planet that rules the day is Mercury. You will find yourself with little tolerance for things that are not important today.  You demand honesty in everything you do and everyone you have contact with today.  This is doubly important on a day ruled by Mercury.  There is a keen sense of order and importance.  Today you are well aware of the passing of time, and know that you must not procrastinate in regards to future goals. There is a sense of adventure in the air, and a renewed or continued sense of optimism.

Happy first of May!  This is called May Day, Beltane and other names depending on where you live and your spiritual beliefs.  This is a also a special day for Faeries.  Even if Spring hasn't truly arrived where you live, enjoy the first stirrings! 

-Aine

Harsh Realities

Yesterday I inspected the back yard.  Now that I've removed the blanket of leaves that I hoped would warm and protect last year's plantings I searched and found the bits of green, the sign that Spring had arrived - and that I am not as bad a gardener as I suspected.  Truth be told, I am not a good gardener.   I fretted a bit over it, hoping that all the new bushes and grasses that I planted last year would be able to tolerate both the Winter and my less than expert skills.  Then I stopped worrying, and realized that this garden is not for the frail.  Those that live on my land must be strong.  The Old Woman has claimed the weak as her own.  Only the toughest live to see the Spring.  And all is as it should be.  

Today the moon is waning 81% in the sign of Sagittarius.  The planetary day is The Moon.  The restlessness of Sagittarius is still with us and today, but ruled by the moon, this day is likely to be a dreamy introspective one.  The process of change always includes reevaluation.  We look at where we've been, where we are, and where we want to be.  Sagittarius is adventurous and always in a hurry to move forward, but the moon lulls us into mind travel, seduces us with imagination and dreams and guides us to slow down, take our time.

There is a person at work that I cannot figure out.  She is so much younger than I, and maybe for the first time I am feeling that disconnect between youth and age.  She is also from a different part of the world, somewhere not far away in physical distance, but so far away from the kind of society that exists here in a small town.  

I know that many in the younger generation now have a certain sense of entitlement.  The parents of this generation were taught that kids need help to develop a good sense of self esteem, which is true in theory, but something went terribly wrong in practice.  There is a self focus amongst some of the children of this generation that is unrealistic and all consuming.  This girl is in a constant state of self defense.  She argues, questions and otherwise causes chaos in her life and the life of those around her.  Even on the rare occasions when she takes blame for something, she quickly justifies her actions and eventually pins the whole thing on someone else.  This usually involves lying to some degree.  

I wonder what causes these kids to be so argumentative, so armed and ready for battle.  I wonder why they feel the constant need to justify themselves to others.  Sometimes, although I will admit it's rarely (due to the sizable annoyance factor) I feel sorry for her.  I know with my wisdom of age, that those in a constant state of defense live in fear and feel powerless.  In my better moments, I see her for what she is - a young girl who is afraid, who feels cheated, and feels alone.  Everyone and everything upsets and disappoints her.  And she tells us all about all of these upsets, looking to us to make sense of it or to justify any result of this.  And of course, we can't do this, simply because sometimes you have to own up to things.  You have to take responsibility. You have to move on, stop adding to your litany of disappointments, unfairness and betrayal, and most of all, stop trying to make some sort of sense in an unfair  and often senseless world.

 I think back to my garden and the lesson I learned there.  Nature is a harsh teacher.  The strong will survive the Winter and the weak will not, unless they find themselves in the hands of a more experience gardener,  are planted in a place with a milder climate, or are graced with an unexpected warm front that keeps the frost at bay.

I'm not a very good gardener.  I shy away from high maintenance plants.  

The whole situation is so tiring and the energy I'm exposed to is assaulting, acidic, relentless.  I'm simply not up to this challenge.  I'm going to have to pass.

 Aine

Message in a Bottle

Sunday.  And the second sunny day in a row.  I am beginning to believe that we are out of the Winter woods.  Today the moon is waning, 89% in the sign of Sagittarius and the planetary day is, interestingly enough, the sun. The Sagittarius moon is a restless one, and yet the restlessness is caused not by boredom so much but a strong feeling of possibility. Today we may feel that anything can happen and may be in a hurry to help this "anything" along.  The energy of the waning cycle of the moon is weak, the power of the moon in its fullest still influencing our lives.  So this is an optimistic day with dreams still in their infant stages but growing steadily and will surely thrive with our loving care and nurturing.

The other day I read an article about a person who found a message in a bottle.  Whenever I read of a bottle washing up on a shore, I wonder if there is a message inside, or if it is the remnants of someone's magical work. Those who use magic in their lives are keen to recognize the items and the customs commonly used in this work, so I was very interested to hear of the bottle's contents.  This bottle did, in fact, have a message, however I was disappointed to read that the message was about the experiment of placing a message in a bottle and hopefully, one day, knowing where it ended up.  

The creator of the message got his wish, but it seems to me that the purpose of a message, sealed in a bottle and thrown into the vast ocean should be grander, poetic, tragic, prophetic.  The bottle should be very old, dark amber glass and should be sealed with a cork.  Inside there should be old delicate paper, when carefully unrolled, displays beautiful words in lovely scratchy, loopy, curvy cursive writing.  

Apparently the author of this note was thrilled that the bottle was found so soon.  It was created in the 1980's.  All in all, this story was a complete disappointment for me, more proof that life is getting less and less interesting every day.  I watch us fight our disappointment by keeping our expectations low, believing in less and less, letting go of hopes without despair, and writing off the best parts of being human - romance, adventure, creativity, beauty in exchange for all things tangible and practical.  Dreams, unless realized have no value.  Love, if not forever is a waste of time.   Belief without proof is a sign of simple mindedness.  Hope is nothing but foolish daydreaming.   Creative endeavors are only as valuable as the money that cane be made from them.  We are all bought and sold.  

I am getting older and like a typical older person, I am starting to resist change.  As most of my faithful readers know, for the last two years we have been downsizing and living much more simply.   I have left Facebook and have a cell phone for emergency use only.  I do not have cable television. 

I am currently weaning myself away from automatically shopping at box stores, and choosing to stay local.  This is not so much in an effort to save the environment but to resist the automatic lure of advertising and the wants that we have been trained to view as needs.  The latest target of my questioning is gift giving.  I live far away from most of my family so when birthday's come I usually buy something online and have it shipped.  I subscribed to lovely animated e-cards as well.  But now I am even rethinking that.

More thought has to go into a gift to make it valuable.  First of all, it has to be a surprise. No more asking what someone wants.  But as people grow and change it can be hard to know what gifts to give them.  What will make them smile?  

The other day I remembered that my grandmother  used to buy presents all year long, just picking up things that were nice, or on sale - not for anyone particular, really - she knew someone would like them.  She'd then let us pick from her stash. It was fun - like a grab bag gift.  Lately I started doing the same thing.  In my travels, I discover small lovely things, little luxuries, like pretty soaps, warm socks, rich chocolates - things that pamper, warm and comfort, pretty things that we don't often buy for ourselves.  Then I wrap them creatively and enclose a real card. Since shipping is expensive, I keep the price of the items I choose low, and if I keep my eyes open regularly, it is easy to gather a collection of  these "lovely things" that will make someone's special day a little more special.  The whole experience of collecting and wrapping and carefully picking out the card, color-coordinating the items made the gift seem more meaningful - as it should be.

Anyway, deep thoughts (as deep as the ocean!) for a Sunday morning by the fire.  Hope you are all having a great weekend.

-Aine